R.I.P my forever love


Iain was killed in a house attack.  He died defending his family, chasing 3 armed thugs with bulletproof vests out of our house and garden.

I cannot talk about it.  It feels as though my life is over. But I promised to take good care of the children and raise them well and be strong.

:’-(  We did everything together.  I have been cut in half.

I will be online some time this week, but I’m inundated with calls (everybody loved Iain), so please be patient if I don’t answer right away or only message.  To write about it is easier for me than to talk about it.







36 thoughts on “R.I.P my forever love

  1. Oh my God, Lili! I am so sad and shocked for you. There is nothing I can say to comfort you as there is no comfort in situations like this. Whatever I can do to help – please let me. This is a nightmare. I know you will be strong as you are anyway and you will have to be even if you don’t feel up to it. But do allow yourself those moments of not being such a pillar of strength. Let others help you. Please. I am so so sorry for you and your family, not to mention for your husband who was taken from us way too soon. Please know I am thinking about you and praying for you. I am crying while writing this…… love, Eloise.

    • You make me blush. I have a new post almost ready to go. You might like it, a question a teacher asked me about how to avoid getting drained by non practicets

    • Ah, a very real question! We tend to invest far too much energy into those who don’t deserve it. Makes me think of the pocket money system: If my kid can raise X I’ll double it and then the goal is achieved. Same with practising.

    • :’-( Nikki – think Federi & Paean and you’ve got Iain and me (except that he was the wild Irish redhead and I was the off-beat gyp). My life has been cut in half. But I promised him I’d stand strong for our kids. We were both prepared to die for them (screaming at gunpoint also bears a risk), and he beat me to it, so I’ll live for them. For both of us they are the most important treasures in our lives, and I feel as though we’re still dancing, me and Iain – across that bridge of the worlds, across dimensions, holding onto each other through the veil that divides life from death, and he waits for me and I complete our mission with our kids.

      Affiliate souls, we as a family are a cluster of those, we occur together. My kids also understood this and hopefully will have faith that on the next spin we’ll all be together again.

  2. Gips. It’s the sort of thing nightmares are made of, but, it’s a living nightmare. What everyone else said, no words and so sorry. I must have read it three times before it sank in.

    Been offline for couple of weeks. Later, after you’ve finished all the obligations, if you want, you have my email. What a crap call sweetheart 😥

    Love RS x

  3. Lyz, I never know what to say at times like this. I’ll just say please don’t be frightened or ashamed of anything you’re feeling right now – whatever it is, it’s human, understandable, and allowable.

    I know you will be inundated with offers of help etc. but please feel free to email me or message me at any time.


  4. Pingback: Farewell Iain Rossouw | Marie Marshall

  5. Pingback: In remembrance of Iain Rossouw | Bookseeker Literary Agency

    • Thank you, Kate. These last 10 days were absolutely horrible. And to top it all I have heard wherever I turn that the violent crime and murder rate against white South Africans, particularly in our area (Pretoria) has been stepped up by a multiple since beginning of this year. It’s a full onslaught. Nowhere is safe any longer for us. We had to abandon the house because after 6 failed attempts to get in while it was locked and we were sleeping, they came during waking hours with bullet-proof vests and fully armed.

      I will write my Iain’s story for the newspapers when I have found a spot of peace, and I’ll also send it to Ireland, wherever they keep their national repository of heroes, because he was like the Hound of Ulster! You know when you read about the Irish heroes, one always has to smile about how they have the strength of ten mortal men in battle? Well, don’t smile – I saw it in action. Those thugs didn’t know what was coming their way. But we’re minus our Daddy and my love-light now…

    • It is a warzone and th ANC pretends there’s nothing. “A crime against a white person is not a crime. Help yourselves to their stuff, their houses, their land because they ‘stole it all’ from you”. My and Iain’s parents stole absolutely nothing, they worked and paid for everything they have and so did we. But that’s politics for you. 😦 Sorry if I throw up when someone brings up “white privilege” – it’s the privilege of having one’s throat cut off and the murderers never getting punished. Sorry about the harshness, that’s the realities we live with in this lovely sunshiny country every day. Yes it is a war zone.

    • Thank you Kate. I hope so! My anger has now kicked in and I’m starting to move things. Let’s see what one angry woman can do against a tide of crime in a sick system.

  6. There are no more words… Absolute horror and nightmares. Thinking of you and the children with so much love Lyz. Deepest and heartfelt condolences. Hugs xxx

  7. Pingback: Let’s not stay quiet anymore – SA in Crisis

Your thoughts on this:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.